21 Chemistry Jokes That Will Get A Great Reaction

The closest most of us have come to chemistry since school was watching Jesse and Walter cook up another batch. And like Breaking Bad, these chemistry jokes are also sure to get a great reaction. As Walter said, “Well, technically, chemistry is the study of matter. But I prefer to see it as the study of change.” And so do we. We’re sure these clever chemistry puns will change your mood and have sodium laced H20 streaming down your cheeks. 

Classic chemistry jokes that will have you bubbling with laughter

  1. What is H2O4? Drinking, bathing, and watering the garden.

  2. I read a great book on helium. I couldn’t put it down.

  3. What’s the first thing a chemist is taught? Never lick the spoon.

  4. Why did the chemist’s girlfriend dump him? Because he gave her a carbon ring and told her, “Good things come to those who wait.”

  5. If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they’d be alloys.

  6. After the date they split up. They lacked chemistry and couldn’t bond.

  7. I gave up telling chemistry jokes. They never got a reaction.

  8. Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.

  9. Why are chemists great at solving problems? They have all the solutions.

  10. Police arrested a man carrying a bag of sodium and a 9-volt. He was charged with salt and battery.

  11. Two chemists went on a date to a restaurant on the moon. The food was fantastic, but it lacked atmosphere.

  12. Titanium is an amorous metal. When it gets hot it will combine with anything.

  13. What do chemists do on Sunday? They go to Mass.

  14. Why did the chemist end his experiment? He said it didn’t matter.

  15. What do you get when you put two carbon molecules together? Carbon dating.

  16. What did one ion say to the other? I got my ion you. 

  17. Are there any good chemistry jokes? I don’t zinc so.

  18. What happens to chemists when they pass away? You barium.

  19.  A girl flirting with her chemist boyfriend says, “I think love is in the air.” He corrects her, “No, nitrogen, oxygen and carbon di-oxides are in the air.”

  20. What did the bartender say to the neutron? “For you, no charge.”

  21.  Let’s face it, chemistry jokes are ‘sodium’ funny.

If you loved these jokes, we’ll try to update them periodically. But in the meantime check out these awesome chemistry gifts and unleash the mad scientist within.